Ok. So, I’m obsessed. It seriously is my all-time favorite movie. You’ve Got Mail has been my all- time favorite movie since forever and this has officially surpassed it. I pre-ordered the DVD and it came yesterday. Yes, I know it’s a musical with dancing (which is right up my alley), but the message and some of the lines (and some of the lines in the songs) are just SO powerful.
I am not about over spiritualizing things that are not meant to be spiritual. But sometimes God uses non-spiritual things to make an impact on me. This was one of those things.
Towards the end of the movie the main character, P.T. Barnham, realized he had been running after fame and ignoring his family and what really mattered. He said this to his wife: “I just wanted to be more than I was.” And his adoring wife responded, “I never wanted anything but the man I fell in love with.” And it hit me, and the tears flowed. This sweet wife didn’t want him to be more, she just wanted him to be him. The exact person she fell in love with. She didn’t want an improved, better, smooth-edged guy. She wanted her guy.
Most of my life I have been living out of the “want to be more than I am” mentality. And everyone around me has never wanted anything but who they fell in love with. Including God. How beautiful is that picture and representation of love. True love. God is not waiting for me to improve myself. He is not waiting for me to smooth all my rough edges. He is not waiting for me to be better. He is not desiring that I read the latest and greatest book on parenting boys to be a better mother to my boys. He already created me to be the best mother to my boys – I’m the only mama they have. He will fill in the gaps.
He loves me yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He has already forgiven my yesterday, today, and tomorrow. People, do you understand and truly grasp that? Seriously, start this paragraph over and let it sink in. I know we just celebrated Easter on April Fool’s Day, but I am not foolin’ ya (sorry I couldn’t resist), the blood shed on that cross erased all sins past, present, and future.
Sometimes I think we get stuck at the cross and ignore the empty grave. The cross doesn’t mean anything without the empty grave. Think about it. Would you rather be stuck on your knees at the cross confessing over and over and over again at the feet of a dead Jesus? Or would you rather be dancing in front of the open, empty grave with a risen savior? The empty grave means I don’t have to come to God asking for forgiveness every time I slip up. I’ve already been forgiven. It means that I come to God when I slip up saying, “God, I am so sorry for losing self-control. Thank you for already forgiving me. Thank you for continuing to want nothing but exactly who I am – your imperfect daughter!”
What a paradigm shift! What a way to step out into freedom and dance victoriously. Whew! And this all seriously stemmed from me watching the movie. Peeps – go watch the movie!
What about you? Are you stuck at the cross? Where is he asking you to find freedom in the empty grave? Where might he be asking you stop and say no to wait for the better yes? Next time you find yourself asking God to forgive you try instead to say, “Thank you for already forgiving me.” Take some time this week to just sit in the quiet and listen to your Savior tell you: “I never want anything but you, just as you are, the person I created and love”. Believe it. Have a conversation with Him and journal what He tells you.
Let me hear from you. Comment below. I know I’ve been silent for a while, but more is coming. As soon as I have a moment to write I promise more is coming. I have been learning so much that I know God is wanting me to share with you.
Ashley Jansen 